Snow: snō/: [noun]: an atmospheric water vapor frozen into ice crystals and falling in light white flakes or lying on the ground as a white layer.
: : :
Here,
a light snowfall has partially melted,
refrozen,
and still clinging to the frozen, dormant sagebrush
which holds it up towards the
weak winter
sun
light.
: : :
I’ve been feeling rather weak and frozen lately.
I never thought I’d feel unsure.
Unsure where to plant my feet and emotions
when I quit work for good.
Working,
was always an anchor in my life,
like it or not.
: : :
When working,
it was always that pie in the sky thought,
especially on ‘bad’ days at work, that you could just quit.
Walking away into a glorious new time of life with all those hopes and dreams that one wants.
Reality, is different than I thought.
Often, life dishes us new ‘conditions’ that we must adjust to,
like adjusting our timing to the fluxing tempo of a dance.
I find myself trying to adjust, find a new footing,
like changing my steps from a waltz to a fox trot mid-stride.
I seem to be fighting a bit of depression due to chronic pain that I never thought I’d battle,
not ever.
With the exception of a trip to a local town
and its iconic livestock sales pavilion
and taking photos for several weeks of events at my church,
I haven’t taken my camera out once,
not one time.
: : :
I apologize for being distant,
it isn’t that I don’t think of you all,
I do,
I am feeling stuck emotionally,
foundering just a bit,
trying to find firm ground,
a new schedule
and
renewed passions
for my life.
: : :
I hope you will be here with me…
: : :
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‘RURALITY BLOG HOP’ #46
Welcome to Rurality Blog Hop, a weekly photo meme!
It’s time for you to enter your photos. ‘Rurality Blog Hop’ is open to everyone who would like to share something about rural life. .
The linky will open every Wednesday morning around 09:00 Pacific Time.
Please! Just one entry per blog each week… thank you!
Thank you for visiting and sharing!
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I know how you feel. It was like that Madge when my daughter left home for College. I hope you feel better. Im with you .
Happy to see your update.
I however seem to have lost my voice… :( and need sometime to get it back and I wonder too who will be with me when I do.
Stay with it and keep on going
Hugs
Lovely Lovely image
Retirement is a much bigger life change that we are led to believe or expect, Madge. I think what you’re feeling is pretty normal. I hope you will find getting out with your camera somewhat therapeutic. Maybe God is leading you into something new. Seek His leading…which I’m sure you’re already doing. Meanwhile, your beautiful photography brings pleasure to me and many others.
So sorry to hear about the chronic pain. That’s a tough thing to deal with. May God enable you.
That can be named “Ice-cotton”! Beautiful photograph indeed!
Thinking of you through this time. Beautiful image in the midst of winter.
I’m sorry you’re “frozen,” Madge. I didn’t have an injury like yours, but an experience in my family “froze” me one year. That’s when I picked up my camera seriously and got started on my present path. You’ve already been on that path, and I pray your situation will “thaw” soon.
Dear sis, the bible says: let the weak say (I am strong). Don’t focuss your thoughts on the pain but on God who is in control of everything, and begin to enjoy your retirement.I learned this lesson when I was forced to quit my job because of a chronic ilness. In the beginning it was so difficult for me and I had the same thoughts and feelings you have. But, gradually I began to enjoy my time by reading and writing. We are here for you. Love you…
Oooh, that is lovely!
Simply lovely Madge, almost like nature’s ice cream cone¬
Madge,
I hope you are feeling better from being sick.
I think we all, no matter our age, go through tough spells. I know I have. One thing I do that helps me see the big picture is to think about my blessings and all the people and life experiences that have helped me get to where I am today.
I understand blue feelings and withdrawing from society emotions. I hope you find those little things that make you Madge, grab on to them and find your solid footing. Prayers to you!
Know just what you are talking about ~ transitions are difficult and life is one big transition but especially when you stop working and lose that ‘scheduled’ life ~ Now it is up to you to ‘schedule’ your time ~ How you want to spend it takes time to organize and find out ‘what you want to do’ ~ It is like having a ‘banquet table’ and there is so much there it can be a bit overwhelming. Even though, I stopped my ‘traditional work a few years ago (retired young) ~ I am now finding myself in another transition of ‘time’ and feel lonely at times because I need a tad more ‘socializing’ because some events have stopped. Lots of people go get a part time job ~ that is great ~ but to me ~ like you I looked forward to ‘being my own’ boss ~ and found I just needed to ‘sit with it’ and enjoy the ‘respite’ and explore my options ~ always options ~ just finding them can be a problem.
As for your photographing ~ perhaps you need to develop a new routine of how, when, what you photograph ~ We all get ‘stuck’ great that you are asking to ‘share’ ~ We are in this together and no one has to go it alone ~ email me anytime ~ carol, xxx – zoe ^_^ – PS ~ have guest room ~ you can always come visit MA when the weather improves ^_^
PPS ~ Exquisite photo ~ love ‘ice’ and contrast of other colors of nature ~ carol, xxx
Lots of distant reiki healing hugs to you ^_^
I love the light in your picture! :)
I understand some of what you are going through. When I “retired” from baking for the Farmer’s Market this past November, I had a lot of trouble getting into a schedule. I’m finally just now feeling like I’m getting back into the swing of things.
Retirement is a huge life change and perhaps just a little time is needed to reflect the past and look towards the future. Maybe God has something else in mind? Something awesome and amazing for you and yours! Hoping you feel better soon and can get back out there with your camera. Love this image, as usual fabulous work Madge.
It’ll all work itself out, you’ll all the sudden be inspired and the answers will come aflow’n, whatever they may be :) Hope you’re unfrozen soon!
Oh Madge, I am so sorry you are going through this. It is hard to lose your anchor and chronic pain drained the life from us, a little bit at a time. I too struggle with depression, feeling frozen, that is just how it feels. I wonder at times if it is the time of year or the weather. The rain can be so mundane at times. You without your camera does not seem right at all. So glad you posted this beautiful capture today. I am thinking about you.
I am so sorry to hear that you are feeling this way, both physically and mentally. Retirement is certainly something we look forward to. But, for so many people, there are issues, illnesses, circumstances, either with us or with elderly parents, etc., which can dissolve the enjoyment and enthusiasm that we have expected to experience during all of our working years. I certainly hope that you will feel better and things will improve. You are not alone. I have not been doing my blog visiting as often as I once did, but please know that I do perk up when I see a post from you. May you soon be inspired to get back out there.
Madge, consider yourself hibernating, waiting for the change to settle. I too am transitioning from rural carrier to care giver of my 2 mo grandson. Takes some adjusting! Love the photo!
A beautiful image. Madge.
I am so sorry to hear of your struggles. I am going through something similar. My job was my identity and now that I am no longer working, I don’t know what to do. It’s probably normal, but I do empathize with you and hope you get your mojo back. I’m sure this cold, frozen weather is not helping. Please take care and know that you are cared about.
Ouch! Sorry to hear life’s throwing you some challenges. Winter’s not an easy time to generate optimism, especially if you’re battling pain. I hope you’re able to give yourself some time and space to meditate on who the new you is going to be. It can be positive and exciting if you ease into it gently and be kind to yourself. And you can also ask your camera to guide you into inspiration and imagery, too. Take good care of yourself, Madge! You deserve it!
So sorry you’re going through a rough time. Change is never easy, especially when that change involves losing the structure of your life. This shot is amazing. I do hope you find the energy, desire and focus to use your camera and keep making such great photos. Blessings.
Beautiful close up and light.
Oh, Madge, I understand completely. Life is all about adapting to those sudden changes we never really plan for and it does take time. It is especially hard when you are battling pain and health issues. Be kind to yourself and take it slowly – you are like a fish out of water now that you have left your old life behind, as much as you wanted the change. Sometimes these things can be isolating, too. (I know) When I quit my job due to a chronic shoulder injury, then the empty nest, and losing my parents that lived right down the street from me, I was truly feeling alone. But time does help and you learn to adapt and find new meaning and joys in your experiences, however hard and painful. We are there for you – the blogging world is so full of wonderful people. Sending you love and encouragement. Hugs xo Karen
Lovely photo. I know that feeling, my bloggy friend, and I know you will work things out. You just do what you have to do and don’t worry about us–we will still be lurking in the wings :)
Oh dear, Madge. Hang in there!
Hi Madge, a big change from working outside the home to being home is a real shock to the system. Setting up your own routines and choosing what you want to do is not as easy as it sound prior to retirement. My post today is about how I cope with life stuff. Sorry to hear that your are having chronic pain. I found photography and blogging helped me to focus on getting something accomplished. Take care. Thank you for hosting even when you are not feeling well.
Rob
Madge, a stunning photo bringing Winter’s blanket up close…:) Please don’t despair over your life changes. Like you, I envisioned something wonderful only to discover some boredom, some sadness, some depression perhaps, emptiness for sure and some worthlessness. Is this all there is to life after retiring? Cleaning, cooking, baking? THe first 6 months were heavenly because of the new found freedom but after “reality” was staring me in the face. It all takes time, Madge, to find what it is that we truly love and where we truly belong in life. I have found my “spot” and you will find yours too being the beautiful person you are!…:)JP
Lovely photo! Hope you feel better. I recommend sunshine! If you can’t find any there, seek out bright lights and music ~ wait, that sounds like a bar! Just put on you favorite music, sit under a grow light or similar, and relax. And maybe try something new with that camera.
beautiful photo! hope you are feeling better!
Madge, that’s a beautiful photo. I feel so for you. It’s really ok, I think, to take a break from taking pictures, and you shouldn’t add guilt about that to your other troubles.
I’ll be praying for you, especially that your pain will abate. Keep trusting the One “who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you.”
Our snow has been melting the last few days. Very strange for January in Saskatchewan. I wonder if spring is coming early this year. Or perhaps Mother Nature is just toying with us. :(
Lovely image Madge!
xo Catherine